How's Your Love Life?
This weekend, I asked the question, “How’s your love life?” as we explored the great “love” chapter from 1 Corinthians 13. Together, we discovered that Paul wasn’t writing to newlyweds, or romantic couples at all. Instead, he was writing to the newly minted Christian community in response to their arguments over which spiritual gift was the greatest and how essential LOVE is to all of them. Love is the glue that holds us all together and LOVE ensures all our gifts are aligned with God’s purposes for the Kingdom.
As we approach Valentine’s Day this Friday, I am reminded of a gift I received that meant more than all the other gifts I have received over the years – one exceptional gift that was selected with my deepest needs in mind. Perhaps, you have received such a gift that perfectly matches who you are – and like me, you discovered, money often has little to do with it.
I received this kind of gift around Valentine’s Day in 1997 from my dad. Typically, my parents were practical gift givers but, that Valentine’s Day, my dad gave me a necklace made out of gold that had a gift-shaped pendant hanging from it. He told me he bought it for me because as his daughter I had been one of the best gifts he had ever been given. My parents couldn’t have children naturally, and I was adopted through Arlington County Social Services – for him, I had been a gift like no other and he wanted me to remember that every time I wore the necklace.
Just a few short months after I received this gift, my dad died unexpectedly of a heart attack. As a result, this one gift became a treasured delight, a bittersweet reminder. Little did I know when he gave it to me how much it would mean later.
Maybe you’ve received a gift like this at some point in your life. For most of us, when we get a gift that touches our deepest needs, we may even forget about all the other gifts we’ve received for birthdays or anniversaries or special occasions.
In the chapter that precedes the famous love chapter, we see the list of gifts that God gives us is extensive and that Paul reminds us how we need to make good use of these gifts. However, even if we get everything we want and have everything we need, unless we receive the one, great gift – the rest of what we have amounts to little more than the wrapping paper it came in!
He sums up 1 Corinthians 12 by writing these words: “But strive for the greater gifts. And I will show you a still more excellent way.” (v. 31) He then goes on to call the “greatest gift” – LOVE. Paul writes that love is more significant than any other gift we receive from God.
The truth is that we can do a lot of VERY GOOD THINGS without doing the very best thing, which is TO LOVE.
If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. (I Cor. 13: 1 – 3)
The truth is that we can do a lot of very good things without doing the very best thing, the main thing – to love God and to love one another. This is our purpose.
We can volunteer at the food pantry, take a meal to someone who is ill, sing in the choir, and serve in a multitude of ways – and still miss the main point entirely. You see, some of us think that church is about doing the “right” things – following a list of prescribed rules. We think “I go to church when I can… I volunteer most of the time when I’m asked. I’m a good person! Isn’t that enough?”
The fact is, you might look like a church-y person and smell like a church-y person and walk like a church-y person – who knows, you might even talk a good game and be able to quote a few Bible verses and still not get that faith is all about love.
All that we do in life is meaningless, if we do not have love.
In a Peanuts cartoon several years ago, Lucy tells Charlie Brown, “You know what I don’t understand? I don’t understand love!” Charlie Brown replies, “Who does?” So, Lucy asks him to explain love to her. But he protests again, “Who does?”
Seemingly, Paul has tried to do the impossible! To explain love to the Church Universal. Paul does not really explain love or define it. Instead, he describes what it is and isn’t. For Paul, love takes care of a lot of shortcomings.
Love is the best way to accomplish what he has been talking about so far in his letter to the Corinthians about spiritual gifts. If you think about it, it’s not too big a leap to think that Christians then, like Christians now – might be fighting about who has the best gift.
We get wrapped up in thinking that our gifts aren’t much and that someone else’s gifts are better. We fail to love ourselves and we fall short of loving others. I once saw a bumper sticker that read: "Love means nothing in tennis. What does it mean to you?"
That’s a good question, isn’t it? Because here’s the crux of the matter… It is difficult, if not impossible, for us to express love until we experience it. Jesus knew that he was loved by God and it made all the difference. We see God telling Jesus how much he loves him in Matthew 3:17, “And a voice from heaven said, “This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased.” This affirmation inaugurated his ministry.
In the Epistle writings by John, we remember that “We love because he first loved us.” (1 John 4:19) For Christians, it is not enough to love – to have the feelings of love. We are commanded to love as Christ loved us. So, hear this Good News today: God indeed does love YOU – no matter what!
This is God’s bottom line for you and me and all of humanity. And it is out of this truth that we are given a greater purpose – to be the greatest LOVERS THE WORLD has ever encountered! Love is a VERB, my friends. It is something we do, not something we feel. And it can be messy and inconvenient and time consuming – and get in the way of all of our so-called plans.
So, let me ask you again, “How is your love life?”
Listen
The contemporary worship song "Build My Life" by Pat Barrett featuring Cory Asbury emphasizes building one's life on the firm foundation of Jesus' love. This song encourages me to trust in God alone and not be shaken by life's uncertainties.
Reflection Questions:
1. How do you identify your spiritual gifts and use them to serve others in your community?
2. What steps can you take to ensure that everyone feels valued and included, regardless of their unique gifts and roles?
3. Why does Paul emphasize that love is the greatest of all spiritual gifts? How can you prioritize love in your daily life and interactions with others? What qualities define true love?
4. In what areas of your life do you need to grow in love and understanding?
5. How can you invite God to transform your heart and help you become more loving and compassionate?
Prayer:
Dear God of Perfect Love, thank You for the gifts and talents You have given each of us. Help us to recognize and use our gifts to serve others and build up the body of Christ. Teach us to love as You have loved us, embodying the qualities of patience, kindness, and selflessness. Empower us to build our lives in You. May we strive for unity in our diversity, valuing each person's unique contributions. Transform our hearts and lives so that love becomes the foundation of everything we do. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.